Can we talk about the airplane just one more time? Even though the pilots have done a preflight check and all they can do to insure a flawless takeoff, there most certainly will always be obstacles to face after the plane has taken off. Flying is no different than other things that occur in our lives. Just when you think everything is going as planned, it doesn’t. There is carefully planned maintenance, test by engineers, pilots that have been rigorously trained in the mechanics of the plane and of course pre-flight checks. It just seems that when you think you are prepared for something that’s when you find out, you aren’t.
Listen, no amount of training that a pilot has taken; no amount of mechanical engineering and no amount of preflight preparation can prepare a pilot or co-pilot for ice that forms on the wings during flight. It is during this most critical time a pilot will take a critical test. The right decisions must be precisely made, control is critical, timing is of the utmost importance and no errors can be made. A pilot error at this point will make the difference whether an entire flight perishes or survives.
As was pointed out in Part 1, in a marriage a husband is the pilot. This pilot is responsible for the total success of the marriage. That is to say whether it succeeds to its destination or if it crashes and burns. In this situation, it really doesn’t matter what the condition of the copilot (wife) is, the pilot is in complete control. You should be aware that if this flight crashes, the manager of the airlines is not going to hold the co-pilot responsible, but the pilot. God expects husbands to rely on the training they have and the training that is available to them to ensure this flight arrives safely (with the co-pilot). Just in case some of the pilots out there aren’t too sure about their flight plan, here’s a note from section Isaiah 41:10 that says, "Don’t be afraid, for I am with you. Do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you. I will help you. I will uphold you with my victorious right hand."
Take control of that flight! Sometimes the co-pilot will think they know best, especially in the face of adversity, but the pilot is the first person the air traffic controller is going to talk to and hold accountable. In the flight manual (the bible), there are several sections you may need to read over to ensure you’ve got the right stuff for in-flight crisis. Here are a few for reference:
- "God is our refuge and strength, always ready to help in times of trouble." Psalm 46:1
- "The Lord is my strength, my shield from every danger. I trust in him with all my heart. In crisis we may wonder, whom can I trust? We can always trust the Lord." Psalm 28:7
- "From the depths of despair, O Lord, I call for your help. When we reach the, we reach the end of our rope, we must call upon the Lord, for our weaknesses are times for his strength; our crisis are his opportunities." Psalm 130:1
- "When I had lost all hope, I turned my thoughts once more to the Lord." Jonah 2:7
Remember, communication is the key to you and your spouse steering the plane to the airport, but God, who is the air traffic controller and holds the pilot accountable, paves the way for you to have a safe landing.
Have you ever taken a ride on an airplane? As you know, there is a pilot and co-pilot who steer and fly the plane. They work together and communicate with each other to ensure you have a safe flight and safe landing. Not all people understand what takes place when an airplane is preparing for landing, but quite a bit of communication takes place between the pilot and co-pilot, to ensure you have a safe landing.
First, the pilot calls off the various controls and the co-pilot will say something like “check” to confirm that the control is in place. If an error is made, they will consult with one another and the pilot will make the call again, until they are both on one accord. Additionally, they will call in to the control tower and speak with the air traffic controller, to ensure a landing spot is prepared for them to land safely. After the communication with the co-pilot and air traffic controller is on one accord, the plane can make a safe landing. When the communication is off, you are ensured of a risky landing or worse. The key thing is to ensure all controls are confirmed and that the instructions of the air traffic controller are followed.
In our marriages, our husbands are the pilots, we are the co-pilots and God is the air traffic controller. We have to communicate effectively with our spouses to ensure our marriage controls are in order. Just like the controls have to be double-checked for accuracy if they are not confirmed to be in order, the same applies for our marriages. We have to commit to ensuring we are on one accord with our spouses and communicating effectively with them, so our marriages can land strong. The best way to do that is to also ensure that we enlist and follow the instructions of God, who is our air traffic controller. If we follow his instructions for our marriages especially in communicating with our spouses, we can have a safe landing.
As you move throughout your day today, think about your communication controls in your marriage, as it relates to talking to your husband about matters of the heart to include the children, the finances, your home, his likes, your likes, his job, your job your spiritual lives and the dreams you both have for your marriage to flourish. If your controls are not as effective as they should be, then pray and ask God to give you wisdom and guidance in working on them individually, and as a couple with God’s help.
Remember, communication is the key to you and your spouse steering the plane to the airport, but God, who is the air traffic controller, paves the way for you to have a safe landing.
Be Blessed Always
James 1:17 tells us that “Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and cometh down from the Father of heavenly lights, with whom is no variableness (change), neither shadow of turning.”
Do you remember what birthdays were like when you were a child? You anxiously awaited your birthday gifts so you could unwrap them. You didn’t really know what to expect sometimes, but the excitement of getting that gift was well worth the wait. There would be times when you got your presents on your birthday and others, well they were a little belated, but you still received them and were extremely happy.
Your spouse is like that much anticipated birthday gift. Didn’t you anticipate your wedding day and looked forward to getting with that spouse and bonding as one? Oh yeah, you know what I am talking about! I bet you couldn’t wait to unwrap that gift that you were blessed with on your wedding night. You bragged about your special gift and cherished it initially didn’t you? What has changed so much in how you value that gift?
Look, spouses come in all shapes, sizes, colors and packages, but they are yours and were given by God, just for YOU! Sometimes as with birthday gifts, they are not perfect and may even “break,” but you work to fix the broken part, so you can get many more years of enjoyment out of them. You have waited a lifetime for that special someone to love, cherish and honor for the rest of your life, so isn’t it important and valuable enough to keep working to fix situations when times get tough?
Think about it, don’t you have some toys or items that you may have received when you were a child that you have cherished for many years? They may break, tear or even rip, but you fix them and salvage them because they are special to you. Your marriage is that same special toy that you should cherish and strive to keep fixed every day. It’s yours; you deserve it; God gave it to you; so keep it! Strive to make it work and make the commitment to do your best at trying to make it work.
Remember, God put so much time, effort and thought into choosing that right gift in your spouse for you. he really didn’t have to do it, but he did because he values you and loves you so much, that he took time to choose this special gift just for Y-O-U!! As a matter of fact, he loves you so much that he gave his son, Jesus Christ, as a gift to you! His life for your life! WOW! Imagine that my friend!
Don’t you just love God so much and thank him for your special gift in your spouse? Do yourself a favor and cherish that gift for a lifetime. Why?
Because James 1:17 tells us that ‘Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and cometh down from the Father of heavenly lights, with whom is no variableness (change), neither shadow of turning.”
Believe It!
Because of the man-made day we call Mother’s Day is rapidly approaching we’d like to seize this opportunity to say a few words. First the disclaimer, these thoughts are not derived from the economical status of the world today, but rather from matters of the heart. Mother’s have been around a very long time and needless to say we wouldn’t be engaged in this conversation if it wasn’t for a mother. I don’t mean because they gave birth to us, changed our diapers and wiped our nasty noses, but because a great percentage of who we are morally and spiritually is because of them. They are in most part responsible for all of our basic manners and ability to know right from wrong. Some of us wouldn’t even know how to wash and iron a shirt is it wasn’t for mother. Some of us wouldn’t know what a Sunday school was if it wasn’t for a mother. As a matter of fact some of us wouldn’t have even known how to tie our shoes if it wasn’t for mother. It is a very strange thing now that there had to be a day designated that we celebrate our mothers. Yes I’ve heard the story how Mother’s Day came about, but I’m really concerned that most of us still don’t get it. I see men and women scurrying about like little bees, in and out of drug stores the day before Mother’s Day trying to snag a card from the leftovers on the shelves that look like there had just been an explosion. I’ve seen men and women days before with their faces buried in a computer screen searching for the express delivery gift and the long lines that at the stores that appear to be endless.
Have we become so materialistic that we have forgotten what truly satisfies our souls? Have we forgotten what brought our mothers delight as we grew into adults or have we become so individual that we’ve separated from the kindred spirit of family? What I am about to propose will seem strange to some, but others will see the value almost immediately. I challenge you this year to come out of your comfort zone and enter your mothers. Walk up to that door with a smile and give her the most precious gift any daughter or son could give . . . you. That’s right, give her you. Take her your love, your conversation, your memories from growing up. Just sit with her until she gets tired, wash her feet with care like she did yours, walk with her like she walked with you to school on the first day, hold her hand like she held yours once. Most of all before you walk away from her on that day, tell her how much you appreciate what she did for you. Thank her for her patience, her guidance, her love, her comfort. Thank her for sticking by you when things were really tough. Thank her for smiling in the face of adversity and knowing how to make you feel everything was going to be alright.
Mother’s day is very different than when we were growing up. We are also very different especially the matters of our hearts. Some of us have developed so maturely we can’t see the sincerity in simple things anymore. There is one thing that hasn’t changed in all of the passing of time and that’s mother, she will always be the same. This mother’s day we only want to suggest that you stop, step back and think about those things that are most important to her and not you. Give it a thought at least.